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After the News

When someone you love just got hard news and is bracing through it by planning.

Before You Start

  • You don't have to fix this or make it make sense.
  • Staying near them matters more than saying the right thing.
  • If they're controlling it by planning, that's how they're getting through tonight.

What You Can Offer

What I want them to feel from me:
What I might rush to do instead of just being there:
What I'm afraid of in this moment:

What Makes This Hard

  • I'll want to fix it or look things up too soon
  • I might correct them to be accurate
  • Silence will feel like I'm not doing enough
  • Seeing them scared will be hard to sit with
  • Something else:

What Matters Most

What do I most want them to know I'm there for?

Things You Can Simply Say

  • “Okay.”
  • “I'm here.”
  • “We can figure it out later — whatever you need.”

When They Pull Back

  • “I'm just here.”
  • “I'm around. Whenever.”
  • “Okay. Your call.”
  • “Whatever you need.”

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